Ok, i'm not really sure i get the concept of "first class" on airplanes. i mean, i understand the idea that you give the airlines a lot of money more than the folks stuffed into the back in order to get hot towels and a seat that lets you breath when you want, but what i don't get is that they get let on the plane first.
i hate being on a plane. If i'm forking over triple cost, i want to spend as little time on the thing as possible. Let me on last.
Everytime i go past the folks in first class, they look miserable. Granted, that's probably because i may shuffle my way to a seat directly opposite the aft bathroom, that i may let my 20lb backpack abruptly 'brush' against someone's head with bruising force, or possibly let the effects of that breakfast burrito i ate 20 minutes ago in order to avoid spending $30 for the in-flight bagel take form, but these are not happy, slightly less rich idiots folks.
Oh well, i'm probably just being jealous as i eat a sandwich off the head of the person in front of me and wonder if blood will ever return to my feet.
Business select with SWA is another joke. For $15 you get 1.5x (or 1.25x) the frequent flier miles, priority boarding (which is probably the best perk), and a free drink ticket.
Now, mind you, SWA is total cattle herding, so maybe it is worth the extra $15. Anything I can do to get off that plane first…
Everytime I have flown on SWA since the advent of business select, there haven't been more than 5 suckers takers, so maybe it isn't a very popular option. Also, mind you, it is $15 over the full fare, not the normally discounted rates you can get on SWA.
What we really need is a stack, not a queue. The first people on have to sit in the back by the shitters. Last ones on get the spots up front by the attractive flight attendants (… yeah right …), then unwind that stack at the destination.
One thing I've found on 1st class (when I've obviously ended up there due to scheduling errors because let's face it I am a comic book artist) is that everybody who's MEANT to be there feels incredibly inconvenienced by the endeavor of sitting still in their comparatively posh seats while being lofted by the 20th Century's greatest testament to the ingenuity of Mankind.
Though on second thought, they may just feel incredibly inconvenienced because they are suddenly sitting next to me.
I always wait for last call before I get on the plane whether I have my kids with me or not. Like you, the least amount of time I have to spend in those seats, the better. Downside to that of course is the lack of 'hand luggage' space available. This time around I noticed how much BIGGER carry on luggage has gotten - there wasn't enough room to squeeze my coat in the overhead.
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For the past six months, I've been round-tripping once a week. I too, do not like sitting on the plane when it's not doing what I paid for.
However, the thing I enjoy even less than sitting on a plane is standing in the aisle of a plane, waiting for what I can only assume are the hand-picked stupidest people to move their completely unnecessary crap into place and get into their damned seat so the plane can get to doing what I paid for.
As a superior-class passenger (which is not me), one has the choice of when to board the aircraft. Each timing offers different opportunities.
First: Avoid the disappointment that direct contact with humanity entails. Get struck by JR's bag if in an aisle seat.
Mid: Experience the thrill of living as a cinder-smeared commoner, lifelessly suffering through yet another indignity.
Last: Near zero wait time, may have to disrupt fellow robber-baron if you have a window seat. Public expectation that you are at least tipsy, if not outright drunk.
The other advantage of awesome-class is you're off the aircraft first, and mired in the colossal cock up that is the deplaning. Your faith in humanity remains unmarred by actual experience with the teeming masses.