i'm glad that the world exists solely for you.
i'm thrilled that somewhere along the line you somehow became convinced that the bestest parking spots in the whole wide world are on the ramps in the garage. Please, pay no attention to the fact that not only am i able to zip around you, find one of the several hundred open spots honestly closer to the destination, get a bit of stair based exercise in, and generally be coming out of where-ever before you even turn off your engine. Please, feel free to ignore the growing number of drivers behind you that also feel you sitting, blocking traffic is a sure sign that your IQ is only exceeded by the number of wheels on your car.
No, i'm not going to let you go because a very large part of me wants you to not only zip into your desired parking spot at high speed, but also to take out a few of the equally dim who also decided to park on what is the local equivelent of the freeway. No, i'm not going to let you out either because the nice people on the other side are actually interested in getting where-ever and that's not going to happen while you complete your 19 point turn.
Yes, there are spots there. To anyone with even the faintest memory of a working brain cell, they're the worst spots in the garage, pretty much for the reasons i stated. In other words, those are the very last spots you ever want to take, and usually mean that you're mere weeks away from bearded, red suited fat men commiting home invasions.
i'm sorry, but you fail as a driver. Your vehicle will be scheduled to be crushed flat and left in it's place as a clear warning for those that follow. In fact i expect that there will be several strata of likewise crushed vehicles filling those spaces within a month.
With any hope, at least one layer will contain the SUV you bought to replace the lexus that got smashed flat last week.
