jr conlin's ink stained banana

Ok, so i'm watching San Diego News and there's a feature about people living downtown complaining about the noise. Except for one thing. They're living near rail and trolley tracks.

i'll note that those train tracks predate the tracks by about 30-50 years. Possibly longer.

Now they want the city to spend millions to make a "quiet zone" around their bargain priced condos.

Personally, i think the city ought to help them out. The mayor should show up, provide each of these residents a pair of ear plugs look at them and say "Aw, Po' baby…" Gathering them together in one location for a public mocking is, of course, optional.

Sorry, but by now, if you don't bother walking around the building you're planning on living in and noticing the large diesel engines and/or low flying jet aircraft lingering nearby before you plunk down your half million dollars, you're an idiot.

And just because you're an idiot doesn't mean that everyone else has to pay for it.

Ah the holidays. A time to gather the family around a rich carb heavy meal and tempt the angel of death for days after.

Better slip that turkey sandwich into the autoclave before sliding it onto juniors plate because it's a harbinger of death! Oh and that cranberry sauce you left out with a piece of plastic wrap on top? Better play it safe and incinerate it in a hastily constructed blast furnace.

Yes, it's important that these guidelines get out because in a population of over three hundred million, each year nearly dozens of people fall ill to improperly stored holiday leftovers. These sorts of holiday feasts and threats are new to our country. It's not like your grandparents served "food" at "Thanksgiving" or "dinner" and spooned out the traditional raw sausage and oyster Wrath of Darwin Brand Stuffing they packed the turkey carcass with before cooking in a wood fired oven might have been more of an issue than the Stove Top Stuffin'® you made yesterday might have told you to put the stuff in the icebox before it goes bad.

No, they did what modern families do and keep those tasty leftovers on the back porch between the neighbor's mulch pile and that septic tank that you're really going to fix this year.

So stay healthy and eat well. Then seal off the kitchen and notify the HazMat teams.