Frequently Annoying Questions




This is my list of frequently asked questions with answers. I've never really understood the value of things like this, but hey, who am I to question the other sheep?

I have a life or death problem/concern/complaint with your employer. Where should I send it?
I would suggest sending that to the company in question. Otherwise you're simply yelling at one ant for having it's colony invade your daisies. Plus there are a number of legal/social/hygene concerns that they're far better equipped to address than I am.
Have you received financial benefit from a recommendation or endorsement about a product mentioned on your blog?
I don't run ads on my blog. My blog is not a principal point of income for me. (I do receive a ponzy payout reward for folks that sign up with Dreamhost via me, but that's about it.) If I recommend you to something at Amazon, I'm going to use an affiliate link. If I recommend a bit of FOSS software I get about 0% of the $0.00US you paid for it. If I mention some other software/gadget/gizmo/whatzit it's because I used it.
Honestly, I'm as low rent as you get. Chances are VERY good that you've probably gotten more or better free crap than I have. If someone ponies up for something I'll use it, write about it, and note very clearly that someone gave it to me because that has never happened before. Hell, I'd probably write five posts on the fact that someone actually gave me something or bought lunch for me.
What time is it?
I've got 08:13 .
What do you want to eat?
Haven't had falafel in a while...
How are you doing?
Pretty good. They haven't found the bodies yet.
Where are my freaking keys?
Didya check your pockets?
Why do you leave your underwear on the bathroom floor?
The salad tongs were in the dish-washer
Were you brought up in a barn?
No, but I am an animal
Do you want fries with that?
Yes, give to me the hot greasy starch!.
How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?
7,000 Million acres
Do you know the way to San Jose?
How do you feel?
With my hands usually
Who are you?
I'm me, the guy who writes this and a few other things. If you know who I am, I'm him. If you don't, I'm not.
Where do you work?
I work for Mozilla (The non-profit that brings you Firefox, and a better web.)
What do you look like?
More teeth than Alfred E. Newmann, slightly more hair than Opie (currently)
Don't you ever answer a question directly?